Hi Amelia! Thank you so much, it means the world coming from you! I would be honored to be in conversation with you. I'll reach out in the coming weeks. Thinking of you. x
I love the deeper commitment to the self and to what matters.
I deleted Instagram from my phone in November before a month-long family vacation in New Zealand. It was revelatory on so many levels. In January, I announced I was leaving social media for good (no active posts or engagement) but haven't hit delete for the same reasons as Rea & Alex: I have a book coming out in 2026 and I know the publisher will need me to market it.
I also deleted all apps—except mail, messages, calendar and camera—from my phone, rendering my home screen vacant, so even when I reach for it, there's nothing clamoring for attention. I have to actively choose to be on a website for bank transactions or to share notes on Substack, which means I have to be on a computer.
It adds pause. Gives me more agency and really makes me think how I am using my time and interacting with technology.
These days I paint and don't take photos of the process or make videos every single time. I go for walks without my phone or air pods. I journal by hand with a fountain pen. I text people sometimes but mostly write emails, post a daily feed on my website (to catalog my thoughts sans an audience), send newsletters to people that I have come to know as friends.
I feel unbound, not just to an algorithm, but to a way of living that encourages and celebrates the constant hustle. And in all of this, I'm finding a sense of peace and what you have so eloquently described as "the ability to be fully present for the imperfect ones. Not validation from strangers, but the depth of my own experience."
I totally hear you about needing to keep your account for your upcoming book (congrats on that btw!). My account is still up too and I left it up for similar reasons, namely to direct new followers over here to The Deeper Call. I love your line, "it adds pause" and the way you describe feeling "unbound". I feel that in my body and life too, it's such a deep sense of peace. Grateful to connect with you here.
This is a deeply inspiring and was so beautifully written. As a therapist who has seen how much social media erodes my clients mental health and my own…it is a mystery to me why we all still cling to it (but also NOT surprising with the dopamine rushes, validation, and narcissism that is on the rise in the U.S…because it promises more money).
I was having a conversation with my partner last night, that as I’m transition from private practice to podcasting and writing…that I want to navigate how to share and express from my soul without IG.
Thank you for this timely article that I needed this morning 🙏🏽
Thank you so much for being here and taking the time to share Gina, it means so much to me. I am thrilled this piece came at the right time for you <3 I am right there with you in wanting to share and express from my soul without IG. It took some time for me to come to terms with it, but after my recent break from Substack I feel more encouraged to share over here and really engage with folks on a much deeper level. Grateful for your share and rooting for you during your transition from private practice to writing and podcasting!
I felt like I wrote this post! We are building a company off of social media, and yet I am an author and have deleted every social media platform BUT Instagram. I haven't posted in months, and I don't miss it at all. And yet, the only thing that keeps me from pressing that delete button is knowing that the publishing industry will have a problem with me just deleting 20k followers overnight. But it's not a place I have ever wanted to be (even though readers have been kind to me). Still, it doesn't make me feel good. I don't ever want to spend a precious moment of my life on those apps. And I want to walk the walk with this new business, Unreachable, because it matters. We have all become addicts--not just to social media but to technology in general. Every precious moment captured, or posted. Every uncomfortable moment, a phone in hand. Heavy users reaching for their phones over 5,000 times per day. It is the biggest addiction of our lifetime, and yet... what are we doing about it? I want to advocate for creatives to be creatives, which means more space. More processing. More filling our own cups, not marketing them. I would love any advice you have on just biting the bullet and pressing DELETE. I have talked about it for years. I preach on every author panel, at every conference, and now, with this business. I feel it in my body. It's time. I think I will put up a post to hopefully have people join this newsletter... and then see what happens. Regardless, you have inspired me on so many levels. Your writing matters. YOU matter. Thank you for sharing.
Beautiful Rea and Alex and congrats on building your company off social media! WOO HOO! I hear you about leaving your profile up for publishers, I've done the same and so have others in this conversation. It seems silly but it's what is required of authors these days. I really hope that changes in the near future. I resonate with everything you shared and I look forward to checking out your business. Grateful to connect with you!
Thank you so much for this reply! It does seem silly, and I hope there comes a day when it's completely unnecessary. I wrote a Writer's Digest article about this very topic. It's like the publishing industry has forgotten that books used to be sold (quite well!) without it! Regardless, thank you for the work you are doing. It's beyond inspirational.
I have this love/hate relationship with social media. I am with you... doesn't feel good. So, why am I still on these social media platforms? I am actually leaning more into Pinterest and even creating pins that lead back to my Substack. It is an experiment and I hope it goes well!
Thank you for sharing this. I cannot agree more. I haven't made the decision to leave yet, but I am reforming my relationship to it. I realized the othe day I am checking Instagram only to see if anyone notices if I'm even here.
I'm so happy to see you back in this space, Ashley. Your writing is healing.
Serendipitously, before even seeing your post, I decided earlier today to delete my Instagram—this time for good. As it turns out, my account will be permanently deleted on my birthday, which feels like a gentle sign that I'm heading in the right direction.
While I can acknowledge some of the positives of social media, I’ve found that, for me, they don’t outweigh the long-term negatives. I’ve struggled with my mental and physical health for years, and deep down, I know that in order to get better, I need to let go of social media—to make space to connect with myself and my loved ones in a more real and meaningful way.
Thank you for sharing—and for continuously reminding us of the present moment, of what truly matters.
Thank you so much Natalie. Truly. I love that you decided today to delete your account for good and that it's happening on your birthday! That feels like such an affirmation over here too. I am right there with you that the positives don’t outweigh the long-term negatives. It took me years to really let that sink in to the point of being willing to give it up.
I am moved by what you shared about your struggles and your internal knowing that in order to get better you had to release social media. I feel the same way. My intuition kept nudging me to get off of it but the addiction was so real in my case. I had to hit a few rock bottoms as they say to finally let go.
Thank you for being here and for sharing so openly. Hugs back to you!
Beautiful decision for you and your family 💗💗💗 I’m also shocked at how impactful it has felt to leave the platform. I hope, for our children's sake, it will be a (cringy) relic of the past in the not-so-distant future.
Thank you Rebecca, I appreciate that the impact is shocking you! Looking back it has shocked me in ways too. I'm with you in hoping it will be a cringy relic from the past sooner rather than later! <3
I loved reading this post. I've been off IG for about a month now and I'm so glad I've been downshifting that area of my life. That then led to turning off CNN.com and People.com on my phone's web browser. I still enjoy Wordle and the Mini crossword with my family. But the rest of it is too stimulating for me. Downregulating is paying off across many life domains!
I'm so glad Caitlin and I really appreciate you letting me know. I love reading that you are downshifting that area of your life and how it has rippled out into turning off other media outlets. Your last line hits and brings a big smile to my face! WOO HOO!
I'd be curious to hear if the screen addiction issue manifested in other ways. Was it purely Instagram or were other sites/activities also part of the story?
Hi! This is such a great question. My main struggle was with IG, but I did notice that the Substack app was distracting me so I removed it from my iPhone and just do everything on the desktop now. It’s much quieter and I can easily jump in and out when needed!
Welcome back! I loved that reminder that IG just wants our attention for their gain, I'm rarely on it these days and am focused on my growing daughter. It's amazing, how little time I spend on my phone when I'm around her, and since she's a toddler, anything can happen! Amazing or accident, I'm present to it all.
Thank you Joscelyne! I’m so glad this piece landed with you and love reading that you are focused on your daughter. Amazing or accident and being present and available to all of it is everything these days! So grateful to reconnect with you❤️
So inspirational, thank you. I have managed to stop scrolling and posting but I do keep the app for the messages I share with friends. It's tempting though, to scroll and engage so I am contemplating the idea of leaving the platform altogether. Thank you for sharing your realizations, I needed this.
Thank you for dropping in Monica and sharing. I hear you with the temptation to scroll, it is by design ;) something that I often forget. I am so glad this landed with you and I am sending all the support to you in navigating the app in ways that honor you and your relationships. ❤️
Ashley! This is so beautiful, and if you'd like to come on Off the Grid to share anytime, you have an open invitation. <3
Hi Amelia! Thank you so much, it means the world coming from you! I would be honored to be in conversation with you. I'll reach out in the coming weeks. Thinking of you. x
I love the deeper commitment to the self and to what matters.
I deleted Instagram from my phone in November before a month-long family vacation in New Zealand. It was revelatory on so many levels. In January, I announced I was leaving social media for good (no active posts or engagement) but haven't hit delete for the same reasons as Rea & Alex: I have a book coming out in 2026 and I know the publisher will need me to market it.
I also deleted all apps—except mail, messages, calendar and camera—from my phone, rendering my home screen vacant, so even when I reach for it, there's nothing clamoring for attention. I have to actively choose to be on a website for bank transactions or to share notes on Substack, which means I have to be on a computer.
It adds pause. Gives me more agency and really makes me think how I am using my time and interacting with technology.
These days I paint and don't take photos of the process or make videos every single time. I go for walks without my phone or air pods. I journal by hand with a fountain pen. I text people sometimes but mostly write emails, post a daily feed on my website (to catalog my thoughts sans an audience), send newsletters to people that I have come to know as friends.
I feel unbound, not just to an algorithm, but to a way of living that encourages and celebrates the constant hustle. And in all of this, I'm finding a sense of peace and what you have so eloquently described as "the ability to be fully present for the imperfect ones. Not validation from strangers, but the depth of my own experience."
I totally hear you about needing to keep your account for your upcoming book (congrats on that btw!). My account is still up too and I left it up for similar reasons, namely to direct new followers over here to The Deeper Call. I love your line, "it adds pause" and the way you describe feeling "unbound". I feel that in my body and life too, it's such a deep sense of peace. Grateful to connect with you here.
Thank you, Ashley. It’s a joy to cross paths with you here, too.
I kind of love the idea of deleting all of the apps except the necessary ones. Hmmm... thinking on this!
This is a deeply inspiring and was so beautifully written. As a therapist who has seen how much social media erodes my clients mental health and my own…it is a mystery to me why we all still cling to it (but also NOT surprising with the dopamine rushes, validation, and narcissism that is on the rise in the U.S…because it promises more money).
I was having a conversation with my partner last night, that as I’m transition from private practice to podcasting and writing…that I want to navigate how to share and express from my soul without IG.
Thank you for this timely article that I needed this morning 🙏🏽
Thank you so much for being here and taking the time to share Gina, it means so much to me. I am thrilled this piece came at the right time for you <3 I am right there with you in wanting to share and express from my soul without IG. It took some time for me to come to terms with it, but after my recent break from Substack I feel more encouraged to share over here and really engage with folks on a much deeper level. Grateful for your share and rooting for you during your transition from private practice to writing and podcasting!
So inspiring!!!
Thank you Lacy! It has been illuminating :)
I felt like I wrote this post! We are building a company off of social media, and yet I am an author and have deleted every social media platform BUT Instagram. I haven't posted in months, and I don't miss it at all. And yet, the only thing that keeps me from pressing that delete button is knowing that the publishing industry will have a problem with me just deleting 20k followers overnight. But it's not a place I have ever wanted to be (even though readers have been kind to me). Still, it doesn't make me feel good. I don't ever want to spend a precious moment of my life on those apps. And I want to walk the walk with this new business, Unreachable, because it matters. We have all become addicts--not just to social media but to technology in general. Every precious moment captured, or posted. Every uncomfortable moment, a phone in hand. Heavy users reaching for their phones over 5,000 times per day. It is the biggest addiction of our lifetime, and yet... what are we doing about it? I want to advocate for creatives to be creatives, which means more space. More processing. More filling our own cups, not marketing them. I would love any advice you have on just biting the bullet and pressing DELETE. I have talked about it for years. I preach on every author panel, at every conference, and now, with this business. I feel it in my body. It's time. I think I will put up a post to hopefully have people join this newsletter... and then see what happens. Regardless, you have inspired me on so many levels. Your writing matters. YOU matter. Thank you for sharing.
Beautiful Rea and Alex and congrats on building your company off social media! WOO HOO! I hear you about leaving your profile up for publishers, I've done the same and so have others in this conversation. It seems silly but it's what is required of authors these days. I really hope that changes in the near future. I resonate with everything you shared and I look forward to checking out your business. Grateful to connect with you!
Thank you so much for this reply! It does seem silly, and I hope there comes a day when it's completely unnecessary. I wrote a Writer's Digest article about this very topic. It's like the publishing industry has forgotten that books used to be sold (quite well!) without it! Regardless, thank you for the work you are doing. It's beyond inspirational.
I have this love/hate relationship with social media. I am with you... doesn't feel good. So, why am I still on these social media platforms? I am actually leaning more into Pinterest and even creating pins that lead back to my Substack. It is an experiment and I hope it goes well!
Thank you for sharing this. I cannot agree more. I haven't made the decision to leave yet, but I am reforming my relationship to it. I realized the othe day I am checking Instagram only to see if anyone notices if I'm even here.
Thank you Meredith. I love that you are reforming your relationship to it, that is so important. And I relate to your last line deeply!
I'm so happy to see you back in this space, Ashley. Your writing is healing.
Serendipitously, before even seeing your post, I decided earlier today to delete my Instagram—this time for good. As it turns out, my account will be permanently deleted on my birthday, which feels like a gentle sign that I'm heading in the right direction.
While I can acknowledge some of the positives of social media, I’ve found that, for me, they don’t outweigh the long-term negatives. I’ve struggled with my mental and physical health for years, and deep down, I know that in order to get better, I need to let go of social media—to make space to connect with myself and my loved ones in a more real and meaningful way.
Thank you for sharing—and for continuously reminding us of the present moment, of what truly matters.
Big, warm hug!
Thank you so much Natalie. Truly. I love that you decided today to delete your account for good and that it's happening on your birthday! That feels like such an affirmation over here too. I am right there with you that the positives don’t outweigh the long-term negatives. It took me years to really let that sink in to the point of being willing to give it up.
I am moved by what you shared about your struggles and your internal knowing that in order to get better you had to release social media. I feel the same way. My intuition kept nudging me to get off of it but the addiction was so real in my case. I had to hit a few rock bottoms as they say to finally let go.
Thank you for being here and for sharing so openly. Hugs back to you!
Beautiful decision for you and your family 💗💗💗 I’m also shocked at how impactful it has felt to leave the platform. I hope, for our children's sake, it will be a (cringy) relic of the past in the not-so-distant future.
Thank you Rebecca, I appreciate that the impact is shocking you! Looking back it has shocked me in ways too. I'm with you in hoping it will be a cringy relic from the past sooner rather than later! <3
Deep, honest, and vitally important. Thank you for this.
You are so welcome Amanda. Thank you.
Beautiful read! Thanks for sharing, Ashley! Hugs from Lithuania! Love, Janna and Oreo
You are so welcome Janna and Oreo! Thank you for being here <3
I loved reading this post. I've been off IG for about a month now and I'm so glad I've been downshifting that area of my life. That then led to turning off CNN.com and People.com on my phone's web browser. I still enjoy Wordle and the Mini crossword with my family. But the rest of it is too stimulating for me. Downregulating is paying off across many life domains!
I'm so glad Caitlin and I really appreciate you letting me know. I love reading that you are downshifting that area of your life and how it has rippled out into turning off other media outlets. Your last line hits and brings a big smile to my face! WOO HOO!
So beautiful. I love this.
Thank you so much Julia.
I'd be curious to hear if the screen addiction issue manifested in other ways. Was it purely Instagram or were other sites/activities also part of the story?
and how your relationship is with Substack?
Hi! This is such a great question. My main struggle was with IG, but I did notice that the Substack app was distracting me so I removed it from my iPhone and just do everything on the desktop now. It’s much quieter and I can easily jump in and out when needed!
wow. how inspiring and what a beautiful read
Thank you so much Tamsin❤️
Welcome back! I loved that reminder that IG just wants our attention for their gain, I'm rarely on it these days and am focused on my growing daughter. It's amazing, how little time I spend on my phone when I'm around her, and since she's a toddler, anything can happen! Amazing or accident, I'm present to it all.
Thank you Joscelyne! I’m so glad this piece landed with you and love reading that you are focused on your daughter. Amazing or accident and being present and available to all of it is everything these days! So grateful to reconnect with you❤️
So inspirational, thank you. I have managed to stop scrolling and posting but I do keep the app for the messages I share with friends. It's tempting though, to scroll and engage so I am contemplating the idea of leaving the platform altogether. Thank you for sharing your realizations, I needed this.
Thank you for dropping in Monica and sharing. I hear you with the temptation to scroll, it is by design ;) something that I often forget. I am so glad this landed with you and I am sending all the support to you in navigating the app in ways that honor you and your relationships. ❤️